Have You Seen This Jacket?
Reply to: pers-602253301@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-03-10, 11:03PM EDT
Dear You,
Yeah, you. You stupid, silly, drunk girl who decided it was a great idea to steal my amazing jacket. Your days are numbered.
The only thing I love more than that jacket are my friends. And THEY would love nothing more than to avenge me. Sure, it was just sitting there all alone on a barstool. So were numerous handbags and OTHER jackets you could have nabbed. Didn't you notice it was a semi-private party? I could name everyone there except you and your stupid girlfriend. So can everyone else that attended. They will get you while I stay inside shivering BECAUSE YOU HAVE MY FUCKING COAT.
That jacket and me go way back. It's been my springtime evening jacket for the past five years. Do you even know what that means? It means I only wear it out for special occasions. In the SPRING. I swear to God, if I see you in it on a November day I will punch you in the face for not realizing the rules that come with wearing a jacket like this. And then I will take back my baby.
I'm flattered that you obviously liked my jacket so much. I mean, I know, it's a great piece. On ME.
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- Location: SpacePort/Waterworks
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PostingID: 602253301
2 comments:
What a sad, sad story about the spring coat.
The lesson learned about wearing a spring coat at a bar is: don't drink so much that it raises your body temperature causing you to remove your clothing, because people will steal said clothing.
Maybe Stacey and Clinton from "What Not to Wear" stole it to save the rest of us from the home-craft project that was her coat.
-es
Yes. People are thieves. She mentions unattended purses. She kind of deserved to get robbed--who walks around a bar and leaves personal property unattended?
You are funny--essie
Also, she has man hands.
rp
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